Federal Reserve creates money electronically, buys bonds from investors. Bondholders get free money first. By the time it reaches you, inflation already ate it. Money printer go brr.

Every Econ 101 textbook teaches incentives, costs, and second-order effects. Most government policies ignore all three. Like someone passing driver's ed then driving into a lake on purpose.

US suicide rate jumped 40% as vegetable oil went up and actual vegetables dropped 10%. Inflammation steals tryptophan needed to make serotonin.

Saving one cat kills 600 chickens over 15 years. Utilitarianism proves petting your cat is morally worse than euthanizing it.

Stock prices follow profits until positive feedback loops create bubbles. More buyers raise prices, higher prices attract more buyers. Then the music stops and someone's holding the bag.

For 10,000 years life expectancy was 28 and GDP was $100. Around 1800 both went vertical. Humanity spent 10,000 years in tutorial mode then someone pressed start.

USPS junk mail 65% discount kills 100 million trees annually. You pay $126/year so credit card offers arrive faster. Beautiful circle of life.

15,000 nuclear weapons can kill everyone 2.6 times. After the first death, you're just showing off with expensive redundancy.

FDA restricted what 23andMe tells you about your DNA. Takes doctors 17 years to use new genetic research. Free tools interpret your data now.

75% of your DNA is junk that cells photocopy billions of times for absolutely no reason.